I hold a odd agitation? I don't want to be a senior! I want to stay childlike forever. Please Help?
OK so I'm about 17 and a half. Young right? Well I don't think so. Schools almost out and everyone is so excited but I'm getting extremely upset and depressed. I discern like junior year was absolutely wonderful- the best year on the other hand. I loved being an upper classman but not being the oldest. I liked still trying to impress senior boys approaching we all do. And now, summer's here and the seniors will be gone next year and... I'm gonna be a senior?! I don't want to be a senior! Not at adjectives. Everyone else is so excited but I'm mad. I hate the idea of growing up. This is what my biggest start is and it's starting to effect my everyday life. I love high school. I love party and I love driving everywhere with my friends. As weird as it sounds, I love homework and living at home and stuff cause I know it will adjectives be taken from me soon. Looking at colleges doesn't make me excited, it makes me want to cry!
And I know this may sound conceited, and I'm really not trying to be close to "oh I'm so hott" and crap, but I figured I better write all I am feeling so that my dread is fully explained. So anyways, one of the things that upsets me the most is the fact that when I grow up I'm gonna miss being hott and having boys hit on me. I'm gonna lose my cute amount and my face will get wrinkles. Right now, when I be in motion out, guys are attracted to me and I get attention. I love being young and study about relationships and going on dates and getting nervous beside guys I like and stuff. But the older I get, the smaller amount pretty I feel I will get. This fear have consumed my thoughts to the point where I bought really expensive facial cream to prevent wrinkles already. Sports is another thing that I will lose. I know I can keep anyone athletic until like my 40's but I'll never be able to play soccer the same. I with the sole purpose have one more year of varsity soccer and track and it makes me so depressed.
The chief issue with this fear is that it has given me this anger towards every fresh day. Every day I wake up and instead of individual happy, I'm upset that time continues. Also, I subconsciously adapted this world view of "living every minute you have to the fullest" and "living within the moment" because I'll never get the chance again and I'm only a youngster once. This seems fine at first but Ive started doing things I never thought I'd do and I justify it by saying "Oh this is what teenagers do, and Im merely a teenager for a little while". But Im doing bad things, similar to smoking and sneeking out and hooking up with guys I barely know. I dont know what to do and Im sick of being low everyday and Im sick of being the only one who's not excited to be a senior?!
When I turn 18 I'm gonna cry. I haven't had a birthday body in years cause it upsets me so much. Is there anything I can do more or less this?!!
Best Answer: I know how you feel. I'm 21 and I was never excited about the age milestones empire usually are - 16, 18, 21. In part because I didn't really care about driving or drinking but also because it intended I was getting older. For me though, college was 100x better than high-ranking school so I don't know who made up that bs about it being the best years of your life span. I just try not to think about what it'll be close to when I'm 40 because I'll be a completely different person then. Enjoy life as much as you can whether you're a juvenile or not. :)
Answer: I'm sorry, but there is a time in life where on earth we have to grow up. It sounds like your really having a tricky time with it. You should talk to a counselor about this and they can assist you see why you feel the way you do.Thats good that you are living every moment to the fullest, but some things you are doing close to smoking and sneeking out doesn't count as that. Please talk to someone you trust and take it a day at a time.
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